The Life Impossible, Matt Haig

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Seventy-two year old Grace Winters is recently widowed, living a life without joy, and quietly fading. When a former student writes sharing his hardships with her without any expectation of a response, he receives a fantastical tale, which she swears is true, explaining how her life radically changed when a former colleague left her her house in Ibiza. Still wracked with guilt over the death of her son decades earlier, Grace has convinced herself she doesn’t deserve happiness. The unexpected inheritance pushes her out of her comfort zone and into a mysterious world. Christina disappeared in mysterious circumstances and the people in the know don’t even seem sure she’s actually died. The home she’s been left is not grand but shows the life Christina had, imperfect but largely happy, doing what she loved. Grace is warned away from Alberto Ribas, but soon finds herself so intrigued that she’s out on the water in the middle of the night with him, where she encounters La Presencia. Her life will never be the same again. 

Bestowed with new talents - the ability to read people’s minds, and more so, to change their behaviour. To start with she uses her new powers in small ways - stopping obnoxious customers being difficult, freeing sealife destined for the frying pan, and getting people to move out of her way. Soon however, she realises that the precious Es Vedrà is at risk of redevelopment, destroying the natural habitat and a place of spiritual importance to the local population. Will her powers allow her to overcome an opponent whose powers seem to be just as strong, and whose ruthlessness has got him far?

The letter from Maurice, Grace’s former student, at the beginning of the novel raises a number of themes that recur throughout - grief, guilt, responsibility, but also worries about the future of the planet. Grace’s journey exposes a side of Ibiza that tourists rarely see, and considers the importance of preserving the natural world. Art’s previous developments, while pretending to be eco-friendly, have laid waste to natural flora and fauna, and his arrogant belief that people do not care enough to show up in great numbers to prevent the same being done to his latest target on Ibiza is a damning indictment against those who put personal wealth above the health of the planet, and thus the very future of humanity and all the other living things that call this planet home. Thankfully, there are those who are willing to fight even when it feels hopeless, and maybe, just maybe, with Grace on their side they stand a chance. 

It takes a lot for Grace to move to Ibiza, but more so to open her mind to La Presencia and accept the strange reality of her new talents. She has a logical, mathematical mind, and La Presencia demands she let go of logic. In so doing, with a bit of a nudge, her world view begins to change and she opens herself up to new possibilities. There are heavy moments in this novel, Grace’s sense of herself is dark. ‘You see, the problem was this: I sincerely believed I wasn’t a good person who deserved happiness. … And that guilt got into my soul and convinced me I was faulty at a fundamental level. And when you believe that, you act on it. … Don’t get me wrong. My capacity for guilt pre-dated Daniel … But Daniel’s death solidified guilt as my defining feature. Something I had to carry forever.’ Her son had wanted to go to the shops with her but she said no, instead he went out on his bike in the rain and she never saw him alive again. Her grief and guilt is written painfully throughout. The tragedy of her son’s death is raw, but perhaps more so the half life she lived as a result, the marriage that never regained its happiness, the torture of blaming herself forever for something that wasn’t her fault. La Presencia allows her the opportunity to see Christina again, perhaps it can also help her to finally lay old ghosts to rest. We see time and again how Grace feels about herself, how little value she feels, yet it’s clear that she matters to those she knows. She showed Christina kindness that stayed with her without even thinking about it. Kindness that changed the course of her life. Maurice too, obviously values her opinion and experiences. Twenty year olds don’t often write to former teachers unless they have touched their lives. We can see the goodness in her and how she is doing herself a disservice in dwelling on her mistakes, real or imagined. She feels her lack of happiness more strongly on Ibiza too, where happiness is ingrained in everything, the contrast is stronger than in her old bungalow. In Ibiza, age doesn’t matter, octogenarians go clubbing with twenty year olds and nobody bats an eyelid. It is invigorating and freeing when you aren’t defined by expectation. As the book progresses we see Grace open herself up to this.

Haig writes in his characteristic blend of people and situations that sear themselves into your heart and slightly fantastical scenarios. This book felt more fantastical than his previous work but at the heart of it all are humans trying to find their way. We see in the characters around Grace the truth that you don’t have to be perfect to be worthy of happiness, and that every life touches those around them. The mystery of what happened to Christina, and the drama around Art and Es Vedrà add intrigue and excitement. An unusual but enjoyable book that makes you question what kind of mark you are leaving on this Earth. 

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Surrey New Writers Festival, 2025

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Each Spring, budding writers and recently published authors descend on the University of Surrey for a day of inspiring talks and growing TBRs. This was my second time attending, and although I do always feel like a bit of an interloper as neither a student nor faculty, it is a brilliant day.

First up were Jenny Mustard and Michael Amherst, discussing their new books which both deal with coming-of-age themes. In Mustard’s What A Time To Be Alive twenty-one year old Sickan struggles to adjust to life at Stockholm University. Although she finds it difficult to form bonds with people she’s also determined to make a fresh start for herself, create a new version of herself. Amherst’s protagonist in The Boyhood of Cain is younger at twelve years old but he is similarly trying to find his place in the world amid upheaval and looks to others for guidance. Both authors spoke of starting with their protagonist and building the story and world around them. They also spoke of the importance of humour to counteract the darkness, something which intensifies it in its contrast. There were also similarities in the supporting characters, each having one that borders on being the enemy of our main focus, but also there being something about them which makes it appear they move through the world easily, a trait our protagonists envy and would like to emulate.

Their books may have some overlap, but their writing process couldn’t be more different. Mustard spoke about meticulously planning out the novel on a spreadsheet. Rather than finding this constricting it gave her a sense of freedom to just focus on the scene she was writing rather than worrying about where the story was going next. Amherst on the other hand falls much more into the pantser category, following the narrative as the characters guide. 

Next was a discussion by mother and daughter writing duo Cressida Connolly and Nell Hudson, who discussed how coming from literary families have impacted their writing practice. Connolly’s father was also a well known author while she was growing up and it put her off the idea of writing, but she eventually succumbed to the urge. Hudson had also experienced some reluctance, turning instead to acting as an outlet for her creativity but coming back to writing for the freedom it gives. 

Connolly tends to write historic fiction (although she admits it often feels contemporary to her while she writes it) and talks about the importance for authors of deciding whether they’re going to write post- or pre-technology. They talked about how technology can age a novel instantly, and how it can impact the storytelling. Many mysteries, for example, will find ways to remove technology even if it’s set more recently as they can cause plot problems. Hudson, on the other hand, writes in the contemporary world, wanting to write what she knows, although quips that she’s spent so much time acting in eighteenth century dramas she could probably write a story set then without having to do too much research. 

One of the most impactful moments for me was in response to an audience question about how they overcame reluctance to share their work. They both admit to having initially found it difficult to let anyone read their books, even each other, but now enjoy sharing the writing experience. The simple answer was, the more you write the easier it becomes. If you’ve only written one piece, to share it and receive feedback is excruciating, but once you’ve built up more of a body of work it is less so. They also made the excellent point that even excellent writers write bad stories sometimes. 

Kicking off the afternoon panels was Ela Lee, discussing her novel Jaded, written during the Covid lockdowns. Working in law at the time, sexual misconduct had been common and had become so normalised that it was only when they shifted to working from home that Lee realised how much more relaxed she felt, how she’d been in a constant state of fight or flight in the office. Her novel explores the consequences of sexual assault and is consciously written in a way to make the reader uncomfortable, to make them question their own stance on these issues.

It also explores the experience of growing up mixed race in the UK, something Lee feels is missing in most books. Writing about such personal and sensitive topics, she spoke openly about how anxious she felt about sharing the book with the world. She researched thoroughly not just the content of the novel but also potential agents to ensure she found the right fit. 

Later in the afternoon Ralf Webb and Amy Key had an interesting discussion about writing non-fiction and the authenticity of the writer in doing so, especially when working in the memoir form. They discussed whether everything included has to be 100% factually correct and whether you should put yourself in biographies of others, something editors can encourage but doesn’t always feel appropriate. 

The final panel of the day saw Naomi Wood and Susannah Dickey discuss the experience of working in different forms - long-form prose, poetry, and short story. A comment that was repeated in some of the other panels was that short story publishing is not seen as viable in the long term, that you might get one collection but are generally encouraged toward novels. They spoke eloquently about their experiences of writing, respecting each other’s ability to create in forms the other felt unable to. Wood spoke about the long process that led to her being able to successfully craft short stories, and the difficulty in switching back to writing novels which takes so much longer and where you have to persist with it at the end of each chapter. It was felt that different topics sometimes feel more appropriate in different forms, that a subject might feel very personal and therefore can be expressed better in poetry, for example. 

Rounding up the day was a keynote talk by Daisy Johnson, who had also recently published a short story collection but who was also not encouraged to think of it as a regularly repeatable experience. She spoke honestly about how becoming a mother had impacted her writing, and how her current work-in-progress has stalled for quite some time. She also spoke about how she doesn’t usually write to a hard deadline, but has occasionally had to and the way this impacts her approach to it. She also explored the ways the land inspires and holds hidden stories which she tries to incorporate into many of her works. 

The Cyber Effect, Mary Aiken

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It’s not uncommon to hear about people attempt a digital detox, to disconnect from technology and re-connect with the physical world around us. Many have a sense of unease about the prevalence of tech in our lives and what it means for the future of humanity, but how is it, and specifically the internet, impacting how we behave and interact? Forensic cyberpsychologist Dr. Mary Aiken guides us through how it normalises deviant behaviours, changes our children’s brains, and impacts how we find and maintain love. Published in 2016, thinking has moved on to a certain degree, technology has become even more integrated in our lives, but this remains an important, fascinating read.

Perhaps most compelling are Dr. Aiken’s chapters on babies through to teens. She talks about how parents will often ask about when it’s OK to introduce screens to their infants but almost never ask about how their own screen use impacts their baby’s development and their relationship with them. Her conclusion is that older family members being glued to their phones has huge impacts on their development. A parent staring at their phone while they feed their baby might feel like a natural multi-tasking activity, but it means the amount of eye contact the baby receives is drastically less than previous generations. Missing out on this attachment forming necessity can impact how they function in relationships for the rest of their lives. It’s not just our smartphones, having screens on in the home reduces physical interaction and play with family members which is fundamental to learning and development. Even as the child grows, Aiken explains how they come to see their parents’ smartphones as competition - studies have shown the disappointment they feel when they see their parents waiting at the school gate using their phones. Again, they crave that eye contact and attention.

As to when they should be given their own tech? It’s recommended that there be no screen time before the age of two. Before this time they can’t understand what the screen is showing them and won’t benefit from apps and videos designed to be educational. It can negatively impact their language development, sense of object permanence, and their eyesight, which develops quickly at this age. Teachers increasingly report that 5-6 year olds arrive at school with the communication skills of a 2-3 year old. Aiken reminds us that correlation does not equal causation but strongly suggests that in these instances they may well.

Children who have never been given time to be bored, having devices placed in front of them constantly, naturally grow into teenagers who are not only very comfortable with tech but already quite addicted. Aiken marvels at the blasé attitude to allowing young people free reign of the internet when we know it’s all too easy to stumble into very dark places. She acknowledges that smart phones have made it much more difficult to monitor online behaviour than when a family computer was being used in a communal area of the home. She flags the lack of concern of social media companies who have access to huge amounts of information about all users but claim not to be able to ascertain if a user is underage. Recent announcements of child-friendly versions of apps for users whose age hasn’t been verified would likely be welcomed.

Aiken does not write with judgment of parents using technology to make an already difficult job feel a little easier but acknowledges how susceptible fully developed adult brains are to the addictive tech we carry with us everywhere, let alone those still trying to find their place in the world. The problem, she states, is that you can’t go cold turkey with tech, so integral has it become to our lives, but we must all strive to create healthy habits around it. It doesn’t have to be inevitable that the internet is a place of exploitation and hate. Moderation by those controlling services go a long way. The internet opens up the world and helps people connect where they might otherwise feel alone, yet we willingly give up our privacy and attention for something whose dark side is incredibly bleak. Despite the sometimes alarmist messaging, this doesn’t feel like a book of despair. Aiken offers studies and facts which can help readers decide what role tech plays in their life and re-consider what we sacrifice for convenience.

Pick up a copy:

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