Millennial women rejoiced when news of Jacqueline Wilson’s first adult book was announced. Twenty years after Girls in Tears was published we had a new instalment to look forward to, a chance to see where Ellie, Magda, and Nadine ended up. All still friends, life isn’t going entirely smoothly for any of them. Ellie has just lost her beloved freelance illustrator job, Nadine is determinedly remaining a free spirit but getting herself in some dangerous situations, and Magda is trying to be a good step-mum as she prepares to marry Mr Right the third. As with all the Girls books, the story follows Ellie, and we actually don’t get all that much time with Magda and Nadine, a consequence of the way many friendships go in adulthood as everyone gets busy with their individual lives. Ellie has lived a determinedly independent life, raising her daughter alone on a council estate that her family constantly tried to convince her to move out of, yet despite this determination and strength, she still has a lot of the hold-ups she did as a teen and lacks the confidence to make her voice heard.
I haven’t read the original series since being a teen and so don’t have a clear memory of all the finer details of the plots and characters, but there’s enough reminiscing to nudge the memory. Ellie’s birthday party serves as a vehicle to re-introduce a lot of familiar characters and catch up on where life has taken them. One particular character, not at the party, becomes central to the story. Former art teacher Mr Windsor, who the girls all had a crush on, surprises Ellie with his eagerness to meet up after so many years. It soon becomes clear however, that he still sees himself as her superior, lecturing her about art endlessly when he knows she has studied and continues to work in it. He has very particular ideas about the way things should be and tries to mould Ellie’s life to fit this. He still seems to think of her and her friends as giggling teenagers, and judging from what we learn of his other romantic encounters, he prefers his women young. His character in this book is overbearing and a bit sleazy. Ellie struggles to hold on to her annoyances when he is being kind, and she reasons that perhaps she’s just being difficult. Magda and Nadine, do, after all, tell her that the mansplaining and ignoring what she wants is all part and parcel of dating men, a sad suggestion of the kinds of relationships they’ve been in. It becomes a frustrating relationship to read as she grows ever more discontented but can’t bring herself to trust her gut enough to leave.
This is a recurring theme throughout for Ellie. Whether it be telling her family how she actually wants to spend her birthday, or being honest with Lottie about the lies her estranged father tells her. She seems to still be unsure of who she is, and if being herself is OK. When she meets a new friend at an impromptu swimming session she realises how different it is with someone you feel comfortable with, who is genuinely interested in your life. Alice becomes an important part of her life almost instantly, and she often finds herself desperate to hear from her. Alice appreciates Ellie’s art, and in return Ellie is impressed by her professional knowledge and writings about elephants, which links directly into a new project Ellie is tentatively working on. The scenes with Alice are nice to read, seeing Ellie finally relax and feel able to share her desires.
We’re told that Ellie and her daughter Lottie are close, although they’re going through the difficult adjustment period of her having left to go to University. The interactions we see between them however are always brief, the dialogue is a little awkward, and Lottie often seems to forget to consider her feelings. She feels mostly a vehicle to compound Ellie’s loneliness with her absence, pushing Ellie into the next stage of her motherhood journey. There are a lot of issues in this book that could have been explored more deeply and I think this relationship and the shifting nature of the parent-child relationship as they become adults themselves is one of them.
There’s a sense while reading this that Wilson is having a lot of fun revisiting these characters. They even reference other of her books throughout (Lottie being named after one of them!) which some readers will enjoy, others less so. It’s an easy read and at times quite enjoyable but Ellie doesn’t feel like she’s matured, some storylines could have been wrapped up much quicker while others could have used more time to breathe. The ending felt rushed and there were some storylines where their lack of a real conclusion felt unsatisfying. It was nice to catch up with old, beloved characters but there’s definite room for improvement. A nostalgia fest for fans of the originals, probably not a book to entice new readers.
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